It’s like this…

“When someone tells you they have an autoimmune disease, they’re saying their body has all the stability of a 13 year old Junior High girl in the throes of puberty.”

I’m in the middle of a flare-up. For the first time in a week, I have the energy to be snarky. And you know, it’s rather satisfying. My joints aren’t too painful to type, at least right now. So, Friends, here I am, sharing my sarcasm.

My body hates me. I’ve often compared my health to a preteen. Over-dramatic. Unpredictable.

Bored? Let’s cause a crisis! Everything going well? Drama- out of nowhere! Terrifying symptoms….and just kidding. Arrrrg. These Immune systems of ours have the supernatural power to create potentially life threatening situations for no reason at all.

That? That organ over there? It has Got. To. Go.

“You! Whatchoo lookin’ at me like that for, Big A** Artery? You goin’ dooowwwwn!”

I suspect that deep inside our bodies, those little lymphocytes, T-cells and macrophages are organizing a large-scale global attack with the ultimate goal of world domination. But first- they play their war games within us, perfecting their craft.

They’re terror cells!!!!

~m

Tags: auto-immune, chronic disease, chronic illness, funny, health, ulcerative colitis